Hint: it isn’t really when it comes to guys.

Because we live-in a fabulously patriarchal community that isn’t precisely everything about in women’s empowerment, we discover ourselves in someplace where ladies enjoyment is actually rarely (when) centered around conversations about intercourse. We specifically never discuss ladies sex as being concentrated on delight. In most cases, its centered on the gratification of males.

What exactly takes place when we explore girls just who sleep along with other women? Here’s a hint: we just you shouldn’t mention it anyway. And, whenever we perform, we once more center it on male satisfaction.

Because this rad patriarchal community doesn’t want to share with you ladies‘ satisfaction, and women pleasuring other women, we will discuss only that—and tear down the notorious misconceptions concerning girl-on-girl hookups.

1. All we do is decrease on each some other.

Going down. Eating dinner out. Or, the sexiest option to say it—cunnilingus. Whenever we are not scissoring in pornography (we’re going to will that after that), we’re ingesting each other on. Every thing relates to preference! There isn’t any rulebook that says queer ladies need to go down on one another continuously. Some individuals really do not think its great whatsoever, and that is okay. No one has actually sex the same exact way! This is exactly why it’s so fun to share.

2. Oh, and scissoring. Plenty scissoring.

Scissoring is kind of hilarious because it doesn’t work for everybody. I understand some couples exactly who swear by it and others which check it out and simply find yourself laughing and doing things otherwise. It is rather a lot centered on anatomy—remember, not totally all genitals are exactly the same!—and preference. We all know at this point that most lesbians in porno are actually straight females executing for males, right? So maybe don’t rely on porno for queer girl sex ideas. But, if you like scissoring throughout the menu, subsequently you should, select it once in a while.

3. We do so for guys.

Simply, no. We exercise for ourselves. Next concern.

4. Strap-ons tend to be an urban legend.

Anytime right people ask me personally about strap-ons, they whisper the phrase like they can be telling me a spooky myth they been aware of once-over a camp flame. People love strap-ons. Some individuals detest them. Some people use them every once in a little while. Plus, some right lovers are completely into it. In case you are thus curious, provide ‘em an attempt!


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5. certainly one of you is consistently putting on a snapback.

It is a funnier one, however for whatever cause there’s this idea that, in a queer couple, one individual must use a snapback. There’s nothing incorrect with snapbacks. I believe they’re hot. But they aren’t needed for sexual climaxes, cool while they are.

6. We constantly climax.

I’m going to enable you to in on a key: the idea that most queer girls perform is actually have sex and climax for hours at a stretch and do not have actually bad, embarrassing, stumbly sex? Its a complete, huge lie. We possibly may both end up being women, but that doesn’t mean we’re mirror images of each various other. Only a few women can be exactly the same or react exactly the same way to certain stimuli. Figures never all get down with the same gender stuff, and a few people like issues that others could not, ever take to. The same as other partners, women who date ladies need to use time to figure out what each other wants.

And then its all orgasms all the time. (only kidding.)

7. we are anti-penis.

Alright, it is advisable to speak about this. Some lesbians when you look at the media (and, well, in real life) desire joke about how exactly a lot they just detest penises and exactly how they are merely very homosexual they’d never be able to find straight down with penis. Nevertheless problem here’s that it is transphobic as hell to behave like all females have actually vaginas, and simply men have penises. No body’s proclaiming that you need to sleep with anybody you ought not risk have sex with, but we’ve got to avoid caught badmouthing penises everyday. They are simply genitals! They didn’t do just about anything completely wrong.

Plus, this perpetuates the idea that queer ladies are lesbians. Some of us tend to be ace, many of us tend to be bi, some are skillet, most are just plain ol‘ queer, etc… we are complex, and in addition we’ve reached end perpetuating odd BS along these lines.

8. We’ve not ever been with a guy.

Going off that finally point, only a few queer ladies are merely interested in sex with females. Many of us have seen sex with guys. Some people have had sex with non-binary and genderqueer individuals. Many of us have not had intercourse with anybody but ladies, but still ID as bi or cooking pan. It really is valid, irrespective.

In spite of how we obtain down and dirty, we’re which we state the audience is. Trust united states. Nobody is any less queer caused by the way they have laid.